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A PARENT???S GUIDE TO CALMING HOUSEHOLD CHAOS

Posted on March 12, 2018 at 2:30 PM Comments comments (0)

A PARENT’S GUIDE TO CALMING HOUSEHOLD CHAOS

Considering how much noise, mess, and time pressures kids create, you’d think they thrive on disorder. However, too much chaos can affect their physical and emotional development.

Numerous studies have found that children growing up in chaotic households tend to have lower grades, less self-control, and poorer health. Contributing factors include excess noise, lack of family routines, overcrowding, and general disorganization.

Negative influences on toddlers were having the TV on much of the day, along with the absence of family routines. Try lowering the volume in your house.

1. Designate quiet hours. Set aside time for reading and other quiet activities free from electronics, music, and loud conversations. Go a step further and leave the TV off round the clock unless you plan to watch a specific program.

2. Lower your voice. Try to catch yourself raising your voice or interrupting each other. Make an effort to speak softly.

3. Listen carefully. It’s easier to pay attention to each other when it’s quiet. Encourage your child to share their feelings and concerns.

Suggestions for Creating Family Routines: Children need consistency to feel secure. Planning ahead also helps you to save time and stay on track.

1. Set regular bedtimes. Enforce age-appropriate bedtimes that encourage healthy sleep habits. Change into pajamas, dim the lights, and read stories to prepare for sleep.

2. Eat together. Kids with regular mealtimes perform better in school and consume more vegetables. The dinner hour also gives you a chance for extended conversations and closer relationships.

3. Hold family meetings. Use weekly meetings to continue communications and bonding. Stay positive and include each family member in the discussion. Remember to put some fun items on the agenda like eating ice cream or planning vacations.

Consider these strategies.

1. Review your parenting style. Some studies found harsher discipline and less supportive parenting in chaotic households. It’s a good reminder to hug your kids today and tell them when they do something that makes you proud.

2. Provide learning materials. Books and creative play help fight disorder. Visit your local library or conduct simple science experiments at home.

3. Rest and relax. Show your kids how to manage stress. Meditate briefly each day and take a walk after dinner. Listen to soft music or practice deep breathing exercises.

4. Tidy up. Your physical environment can produce anxiety or soothe your senses. Reduce clutter by selling or giving away unwanted items. Focus on buying less stuff and designing attractive storage solutions for the possessions you want to keep.

5. Pull together. Give each family member a part to play in transforming your household. Small children may want to put away their toys while teens can bring you up to date on apps for managing your time and tasks.

Dr. Felton

Raising Independent Children When They are Shy

Posted on February 22, 2018 at 1:20 PM Comments comments (1)

Raising Independent Children When They are Shy                   

As the parent of a shy child, you may be you concerned about how they're treated in the classroom or when they are not in your presence. You may know that your child is gifted and or curious which leads them to be quieter than others because they are not comfortable speaking up. This may have affect their grades in the past because others may not understand their personality. Some may see your child’s shyness as being disengaged but they are actually deep in thought. The good news is that some education experts are beginning to see the light. They're focusing more on learning and less on talking.

Take advantage of these trends so you can nurture your child's strengths while preparing them to succeed in any environment. Consider these suggestions for steps you can take at home, with other family members, friends of the family, and most importantly with those who may work with your child outside of your home.

Steps to Take with Your Child

Studies show that introverts can be just as happy and productive as extroverts. Raise your child to thrive as their authentic self. 

1. Validate their experiences. Introverts may have to work harder to achieve recognition. Boost your child's resilience by listening attentively to what they have to say, and expressing compassion.

2. Find their passions. It's natural for any child to open up when they feel enthusiastic about the subject. Help your child to explore their interests.

3. Offer positive feedback. Praise your sons and daughters for making an effort. Guide them by pointing out specific signs of progress.

4. Model assertiveness. Quiet students may need help sticking up for themselves. Demonstrate how to resolve conflicts and teach them how to ask for what you need.

5. Proceed gradually. Introverts typically prefer to spend more time thinking before acting. Be patient and allow your child to proceed at their own pace. Their deliberate process probably produces superior results even if it takes a little longer.

Additional Steps to Take

There's a tendency for teachers to feel more comfortable with talkative children. This will make sense to you if you are met with, “he or she is so quiet”.

1. Explain the science. Your child's teacher may be more receptive if you describe the biological evidence of differences between extroverts and introverts. Ideally, children can learn on their own terms instead of conforming to one standard.

2. Break into groups. Discussion groups and project teams help students to develop closer relationships and deepen learning. Kids can practice solving problems, and there's less chance that a few students will dominate the conversation. This works for school and for those who are homeschooled.

3. Peer teaching. Students teaching each other is an especially powerful technique. Children master the subject matter while developing presentation skills.

4. Schedule pauses. By requiring a brief silence before answering, you can encourage thoughtful responses. It also gives more kids a chance to weigh in.

5. Move around. Experiment with formats that encourage socializing and natural conversation. Allowing kids to move to different areas of the classroom or home can open up discussion of geometry or classic novels. Even looking at a colorful poster can generate comments and questions.

6. Create quiet spaces. While introverts have a greater need for solitude, any student can benefit from a place to rest and reflect. Allowing them to have a space of their own is essential to creating independence can confidence.

Every child deserves a quality education based on teaching methods that adapt to a wide range of personalities. Raise independent children by building up their confidence and serving as their primary advocate.

Dr. Felton

Felton International Therapeutic Coaching

www.feltoninternationalcoaching.com

nlhcw1@outlook.com

10 Ways to Build Self-Esteem in Children

Posted on February 16, 2018 at 12:55 AM Comments comments (3)

It only takes a little effort to help a child move in the direction of their dreams. Be the unseen hero.

Weekly Blog


Dr. Nicole’ talks about ways to build self-esteem in children.

Many of the challenges that plague children are the result of low self-esteem. Teenage pregnancy, drug usage, poor grades, fighting, depression, harming animals and humans, and even suicide. A child with high self-esteem will enjoy life and have a more successful childhood. Children with high self-esteem are likely to grow into adults with high self-esteem.


Feeling perplexed about what will happen to our children is likely to cause us to feel overwhelmed and that we do not have the ability to help them. Let me share with you 10 successful ways to help build your child’s self-esteem and confidence:

1. Draw attention to your child’s strengths. Let your child bask in the glory of being good at something. Whether your child’s strength is in school, throwing a fastball, or playing Go Fish, let them know that you notice how great they are in what they like to do.

2. Teach your child how to deal with failure. Explain that it happens to everyone and is part of life. Help your child examine what went wrong in their approach and how to improve. Encourage your child to be persistent until success is achieved.

3. Give your child choices. Just be sure to control the options. Suppose your young child is getting dressed for school. Instead of choosing the clothes for your child, allow him/her to have a few options. Choose a few different outfits and then allow your child to choose between them. You’ll have a well-dressed kid that feels empowered because they chose their own clothes.

4. Allow your child to fit in at school. The idea of purple jeans might seem bizarre to you, but if that’s what all the cool kids are doing, let it go..it really isn’t a big deal. Besides, it’s all about helping them feel better about who they are. It can be difficult for adults to remember the importance of peer acceptance at any level of school high school. If they are not interested in fitting in, choose your battles…allow them to stand out. The point is that you are allowing them to be who are comfortable being….themselves.

5. Allow your child to struggle a little. It can be hard to resist the urge to provide help at every opportunity. However, it can be great for a child to learn how to deal with struggle. Ensure that the struggle ends successfully! Give your child the opportunity to be successful without parental intervention. If you have any specific questions on this topic, post it on my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/feltoninternationaltherapeuticcoaching/?ref=bookmarks I’ll do my best to help you figure it out!

6. Be reasonable in your praise. Your 9-year old knows his/her drawing of a butterfly isn’t the best butterfly the world has ever seen. But your offer of praise should be sincere, “I love how you used so many colors in the wings.”

7. Allow your child to overhear you complimenting them. For example, the next time you’re on the phone in front of your child, mention something positive about him/her. They’ll be sure to hear and feel on top of the world. Do not offer unrealistic praise for something they didn’t do. Remember, be sincere.

8. Avoid comparing one child to another. All people are individuals. Comments like, “Why can’t you be as neat as your sister?” cause more harm than good. Just don’t do it.

9. Spend time alone with your child. It’s one way of showing that your child is important to you. Your child knows you could be doing a lot of other things, but you chose to spend time with him/her instead.

10. Be encouraging. We all require support from time to time. When your child is struggling, provide encouragement and support. Let them know that they’re not alone. Consider what you would’ve liked to hear as a child and allow that to be your guide.

A child with a healthy level of self-esteem will be happier and perform better in school. As a parent, you have a strong influence over your child’s self-confidence. Making your child feel good about him/herself is one of your greatest responsibilities. Pay attention to the little things each day, because that’s what your child is doing!

Be proactive!

Dr. Felton

Felton International Therapeutic Coaching

www.feltoninternationalcoaching.com

nlhcw1@outlook.com

Birthing "The Color of Me"

Posted on February 8, 2018 at 11:35 AM Comments comments (4)


So, I want to begin this week’s blog by saying “Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!” The interest in our new program “The Color of Me” has been amazing! In a few short weeks, FTC will be releasing the first in a series of 8 coloring work books that focuses on behavior and emotional disorders in children. These books are made being mindful of how important it is for consistent and open communication to exist between children and their parents/caregivers. They are also effective in the therapeutic process to help professionals and paraprofessionals find noninflammatory ways to communicate with their clients.

Additionally, in a few weeks FTC will be announcing our new venue to work with you so you can better understand how this process can be beneficial to your child and help create a healthy dialogue for children who are struggling with having their voice being heard. In your interest of “The Color of Me” you have asked why???? Even though there’s so much to share with you this week…it is important to take the time to help you understand why “The Color of Me” was birthed.

According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), approximately 8.3 million children (14.5%) aged 4–17 years have parents who’ve talked with a health care provider or school staff about the child’s emotional or behavioral difficulties and nearly 2.9 million children have been prescribed medication for these difficulties. Because we are not fully aware of why many behavior and emotional disorders occur, “The Color of Me” coloring books, guidebook, and workbooks series will cite several known factors such as trauma, stress, family and diet, as well as noting the importance of being able to allow the brain to work on it’s own instead of trying to force the cooperation of a child through normal talk therapy methods. Our methods will not alter or change but enhance current therapeutic techniques being utilized such as Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Play, Sand tray, and Art Therapy.

This is just the beginning of a lifelong change when struggling to help children become more mindful and for you to become more knowledgeable about how you can help your child. We are not always aware of how outside stimulation effects our children’s behavior and emotions but today we take up the responsibility of being a part of positive change.

Our hope is to empower those who feel weary of their daily struggles and have run out of plausible ways to help their children and themselves interact in a calming manner find strength through the use of color. Next week FTC will introduce to you the behavior and emotional disorders that will be covered in Volume 1 our coloring workbook series.

Stay Tuned! There’s so much more to come! Dr. Felton 

Understanding “The Color of Me”

A special platform to discuss how color can modify unwanted behaviors.

What behavior and emotional disorders we will cover first.

Coloring Workbooks Coming Soon!

TRAINING AND EDUCATION IS KEY

 


February 2018 Understanding the Movement

Posted on February 1, 2018 at 4:20 PM Comments comments (5)

6 Free Tips on Fulfilling Your New Year????????s Goal

Posted on January 3, 2018 at 3:40 PM Comments comments (4)

Well, it’s here! A New Year with New goals…..many coaches will let you know a month from now what you can do to ensure you fulfil your goas…well, I want to help you stay focused and get a head start on success so here you go…

Challenge yourself to work on these five things everyday over the next month and you will be successful!

1. After you have made up your mind to accomplish something…no matter what it is…you have to remain focused on the prize. There may be some down days but do not let one down day ruin your passion for moving forward. Keep a journal of how you plan to work on that goal and tell others so they will keep you accountable.
2. Speak it out loud so you can speak truth to your dreams….make them feel real.
3. Create a routine to follow daily..if this is impossible, create a pattern of accomplishment…if you can’t work on it every morning, then ensure you work on it before you go to bed.
4. Make a schedule of what you plan to accomplish, how you plan to accomplish it and list signs for you to look out for if you are falling behind or no longer motivated to move forward.
5. Ensure your goals are measurable by you…so that you can see your progress…daily, weekly, monthly…whatever works for you!
6. Celebrate every accomplishment! Even if it’s a small one…just celebrate out loud and with purpose.
You’ve got this! More to Come!

#Watchthisspace #Livingoutloud

Always remember to stay focused, take one step at a time, reflect on your accomplishment, and celebrate!

Dr. Nicole' 

Time to Find and Embrace Your Best Self

Posted on December 28, 2017 at 11:15 AM Comments comments (1)

Time to Find and Embrace Your Best Self

Every year we come up ideas that help us move forward or at least set a goal to do so and every year we fall short.

Make this your follow through year, make this the year you will actually do the things you plan for because you want to be successful in your choice.

Many of you have listened to my latest podcast and feel successful because you beat the holiday blues. With so much technology we are moving faster or at least the world is moving faster and we hope to be able to keep up.

But.... if this is you: 

Want to lose weight. 

Want a better paying job. 

Want your child to have better behavior.

Ready to let go of your addictions once and for all. 

Feel stuck in a relationship. 

Want to feel apreciated.  

Want a life change. 

Want to get that book published. 

Have a new career as an excutive and feel challenged to be good enough. 

Want to find your best self.

Then coaching may be for you!

Some feel they do not need a coach...because there are so many online videos and blog posts that you can just read until you find what works for you....all of this information can be an overload...because....if you don't where you are...... how can you determine the best direction to move forward?

I am your coach...therapeutic, executive, addictions, life....I want to help you bring your life to a conscious level...bring you to your own attention so you can be your best self.  

One session will help you open up to who you truly are inside and help you find and become your best self. Sometimes we think we know what is best or what we want but it's not quite clear on how to get there....well, that's how I can hep you. 

For new coaches... if you want your business to take off...find yourself a mentor...at least for the first couple of years and work on finding your best area to help others. 

For parents, I have something extra special for you in 2018! Stay tuned for that...but for the time being feel free to keep checking in. 

For professionals working with children, I have something special coming in 2018 for you as well. 

It's going to be a great year...I am here for you! 

Your Therapeutic, Executive, Addictions, Life Coach 

Happy New Year!

Nicole'  



Utilizing Your Professional Coach

Posted on March 2, 2017 at 10:50 AM Comments comments (0)

Even though you feel a need for your professional coach for one thing, you will find that this ability to help you find your niche' can be all encompassing. A coach that is looking out for your best interest is an expert who is good at helping others find and develop positive change in their lives. These goals are vast and includes health, work-life balance, relationship, finances, social, business and leadership, and self-focus. If your coach is effective for you continue to work with them to help you find your niche' and interpersonal success.

Happy Holidays 2015

Posted on December 26, 2014 at 8:05 AM Comments comments (2)



One More Day-January 2015 Release

Posted on December 23, 2014 at 1:05 PM Comments comments (0)

Press Release: 



One More Day Holiday will be released January 1-- with an exclusive interview and cover featuring Tina D'Amico, LCSW. Tina is the owner and therapist of Coupledom Counseling (www.coupledomcounseling.com) in Williamsburg, Virginia. Tina's dedication to her clients shows how her therapeutic techniques are the epitome of her favorite personal quote:

" Be the change you wish to see in the world." –Gandhi.

In our holiday edition we will share with you 10 REASONS why Tina is one of the most sought out mental health professionals in the Williamsburg area. Inside OMD you will also find: "Detox vs. Cleanse: Is there a Difference?" by Cheryl Felder-Brannon, MA, CHHC, CPC, RYT, Integrative Life Coach of Halls of Healing at www.hallsofhealing.com and other informative articles. Be sure to log in and sign up for our next edition of OMD at www.one-more-day.com. 

Happy Holidays!


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